Don’t Ignore Each Other

This is National Infertility Awareness Week and in a timely fashion, the fashionable New York Times published this brilliant article on the power of sisterhood.  Its science, you see:

“Researchers have discovered that female chacma baboons with strong sororal bonds have lower levels of stress hormones,
live significantly longer and rear a greater number of offspring to independence than do their less socialized peers.”

After my first miscarriage and a year of failing to conceive I wrote a letter my to closest girlfriends entitled “I Need My Village More Than Ever”.  I outed myself, my shame and my pain and what I received in return was a lightness of being, that tangible feeling of being supported by loved ones.  They remain with me years later, deep into secondary infertility and my support net has grown even wider.
One of the best things I did in the midst of infertility was create a Fertility Support Group, Paperwhites, while living in Bermuda.  I would have simply attended had there been a group available but there was none, so I started one.  I was going through my second IVF in 2009 and by the time of Paperwhites’ first meeting in May I was pregnant.  An unconventional beginning but me being pregnant didn’t erase the community’s need and with guidance from RESOLVE, we did it.  We came together as sisters and brothers bearing the same burden and we helped each other.  I’m proud and grateful that the group continues today.
Its a jungle out there.  Grab your vine, your syringes, your big girl black panties and swing on over to your local support group.  Don’t ignore each other or your own need to be heard and helped.  If you’ve been reluctant to tell someone, tell me.  Use this Awareness Week as the starting point to start feeling better.
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